SexuallyConfidentWife.com Official Blog

With the national release of The Sexually Confident Wife this week, we’re in full swing with radio and television interviews, for both the mainstream and Christian market. In fact, be sure to tune into The Today Show (NBC) next Friday, October 3^rd during the 10 a.m. (eastern time) hour!

All interviews have gone incredibly well so far, and both male and female interviewers are enthusiastically supporting this much-needed message. However, I was flabbergasted at the direction that one interviewer went in (a radio talk show pastor who shall remain nameless). Just to hit the highlights, he said things like:

• “But isn’t sex part of our sinful ‘animal’ nature?” I expressed my disagreement, explaining that God created man (and woman!) as sexual beings BEFORE the fall of man. There’s nothing sinful about married sex. God gave Adam and Eve the command to “be fruitful and multiply,” which means “have sex and make babies.” His rebuttal was, “But Adam and Eve weren’t able to fulfill that command until AFTER the fall.” As if God commanded mankind to do something that we’d have to SIN in order to accomplish??!! Therefore no child is ever born out of LOVE, only out of SIN? I don’t think so! But that’s not all. Keep reading…
• “Oral sex is part of our ‘animal nature!” Excuse me, but I can’t think of a single animal on the planet that has oral sex. Can you? I explained that long before personal lubricants were invented, God gave us the gift of saliva, and the Song of Solomon is VERY “oral” in nature (i.e. ”I delight to sit in my lover’s shade, and his fruit is sweet to my taste… Let my lover come into his garden and taste its choice fruits.”) His response was that Solomon’s demise was his sexual relationships with his multiple wives. So we should just disregard that book of the Bible? I refuse to do that! Besides, it was Solomon’s worship of the false gods of his foreign wives that led to his demise, not his marital sex life.
• “When a woman gives her husband sex it only makes him want more and more, so she’s going to feel put upon and he’s going to have to look elsewhere… it’s best for a woman to not awaken that ‘animal nature’ in her husband.” HELLO??!! So a wife should just withhold all sex from her husband and expect him to be asexual (completely celebate with no sexual thoughts, longings, etc.)? Once again, I declared that I strongly disagree, indicating that this would be a recipe for a major marital disaster. I replied, “My husband and many other men in this world receive sexual pleasure from their wives several times a week, and they are perfectly satisfied. They DON’T go looking elsewhere, NOR do all their wives feel “put upon” because she gets plenty of pleasure out of it too!

UGH! Does any of this make your blood boil like it does mine? I feel like I need to step outside for a cigarette, and I don’t even smoke.

I don’t know if you hold any religious beliefs or not, but if you do, please know that God does NOT turn His back in disdain every time a husband and wife make love. He doesn’t blush, or roll His eyes, or complain, “Oh gee, they’re doing THAT again?” On the contrary, God’s desire is for married couples to frequently unwrap the gift He has given us in one another and freely enjoy intimate pleasures, without one ounce of guilt or shame.

‘Nuff said. I’ll get off my soapbox now so my blood pressure doesn’t send me into heart attack mode.

Wishing you the BEST sex,

Shannon