Shannon Ethridge's Blog

Today is Day #6 of my Daniel Fast – eating nothing but fruits, vegetables, nuts, and seeds.  I’ll soon be incorporating other WHOLE foods (or foods in their natural state, avoiding foods that are processed to the point that they lack much real nutritional value at all).  But surprisingly, I don’t feel as if I’m in any mad rush to do so.

I honestly can’t believe how great I’m feeling… how good I’m sleeping… how much energy I have… how I’ve had NO headaches, NO hunger pains, and NO cravings.   I’m finally beginning to realize that when you give your body all the nutrients that it needs (such as through massive amounts of plant-based foods), it doesn’t need to send S.O.S. signals such as hunger pains and cravings.  It’s content.  It’s nourished.  It’s satisfied.  And it feels amazing!

I can see why Daniel and his friends chose this diet as opposed to the king’s “rich foods.”

At the end of the ten days, Daniel and his three friends looked healthier and better nourished than the young men who had been eating the food assigned by the king.     So after that, the attendant fed them only vegetables instead of the food and wine provided for the others.  God gave these four young men an unusual aptitude for understanding every aspect of literature and wisdom. And God gave Daniel the     special ability to interpret the meanings of visions and dreams.

(Daniel 1:15-17)

In addition to Daniel experiencing amazingly clear thinking after such a fast, I was recently watching another documentary on the health benefits of all natural foods and a plant-based diet called “Food Matters.”  In one section of the film, Bill W., founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, was mentioned as having abided by such a diet.  As a result, Bill W. noticed that he was better able to control his addictions through clearer thinking, and recommended such a diet to the support group members.  They also were surprised at how much easier their “demons” were to manage (alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, inappropriate sexual relationships, etc.) when they ate the healthiest of foods containing the highest concentration of nutrients.

So now I’m wondering …

• Could there REALLY be a connection between addiction management and healthy nutrition?
• Could our brain chemistry be a large part of the reason why many of us are drawn like a moth to a flame toward unhealthy behaviors?
• If we alter our brain chemistry through the fuel we put in our bodies, can we alter our addictive personalities?
• Could inappropriate emotional entanglements be easier to avoid simply by avoiding unhealthy food?
• Are our hearts and spirits so “hungry” for love, attention, and affection simply because our brains and bodies are so “hungry” for the right kind of fuel?
• Could processed and refined foods (white sugar, white flour, etc.) be one of the biggest culprits in the sex & love addict’s life?
• Could the emotional roller coaster rides we often find ourselves on (including anger & depression) be better controlled through proper nutrition?
• Could our marriages or romantic relationships be drastically improved simply by improving our diet?

If you’re as curious as I am, why don’t you JOIN ME in a 10-day fruit & vegetable fast to test the theory for yourself?

I noticed a huge difference in my thinking within the first 3-4 days, so I’m going to continue on for a while, hoping to see an even BIGGER improvement in my mental focus and emotional sobriety!

What are your thoughts?  Do YOU think there could be a connection between addiction & nutrition?

Please chime in on the discussion, as I’m thinking this concept could easily turn into a future book, and I’m looking for rich fodder!  Thanks!

Many have asked, “What’s on your list of New Year’s Resolutions?”

My answer:  To be HEALTHY in every way!

SPIRITUALLY – I’m reading through the New Testament and journaling what I sense God speaking directly to me as I go.

MENTALLY – I’m deeply engrossed in research for my next book projects, which keeps me mentally stimulated and focused.

EMOTIONALLY – I’m investing in a few key friendships with folks that keep me sane and entertained, filling my cup so I can turn around and fill others.

SEXUALLY – I’m committed to keeping the home fires burning as a Sexually Confident Wife, of course!

PHYSICALLY – I continue to routinely walk, bike, stretch, & swim when possible, and I try to watch what (and how much) I eat.  My biggest goal is to consistently implement tons more fruits & vegetables into my daily diet for a healthier lifestyle, so I asked for a juicing machine for Christmas and Santa delivered.  In fact, I’m starting out the year with a Daniel Fast, so here’s what my dinner looked like today…

BEFORE – swiss chard, celery, carrots, zucchini, summer squash, pear, apple, lime & cranberries

AFTER – a delightful, micronutrient-rich juice dinner for two!

If you want to know more about the health benefits of juicing, watch the movie “Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead” – if that doesn’t inspire you to eat more fruits & veggies, nothing will!  (and special thanks to Michael Hyatt, President of Thomas Nelson Publishers for suggesting the movie and turning me onto this idea through his blog!)

To properly care for the bodies, minds, souls, and relationships that God has entrusted to us during our lifetime is about the best resolution we can make, so those are my goals for 2012!

What about you?  What are your New Year’s Resolutions for 2012?

Hoping it’s your best year yet – in every way!

Shannon

Thanks to Jessica, a beloved BLAST participant, for responding to these recent joke blogs with her own knee-slapper:

A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.

While on the operating table she had a near death experience.. Seeing God she asked “Is my time up?”

God said, “No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live.”

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.

She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, “I thought you said I had another 43 years? Why didn’t you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?”

God replied: “I didn’t recognize you.”

I love how my father and husband feel it is their responsibility and contribution to this ministry to provide “appropriate sexual jokes” (if there is such a thing) that are “clean enough” for me to share from a speaking platform.  Sometimes they strike out royally… other times they hit a home run!  This one came from Greg this week, and I thought it was TOO FUNNY NOT TO SHARE…

A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot.
The doctor comes in and says, “Ah, I see you’ve regained consciousness.  Now you probably won’t remember, but you were in a pile-up on the motorway. You’re going to be okay, you’ll walk again, but…something happened. I’m trying to break this gently, but the fact is, your willy was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it!”
The man groans, but the doctor goes on, “You’ve got $9,000 in compensation coming to you from the insurance company, and we have the technology to build you a NEW willy, which will work even better than your old one did!  The thing is, it doesn’t come cheap….it’s $1,000 per inch!”
The man perks up at this.
“So,” the doctor says, “It’s for you to decide how many inches you want?  I’d suggest you discuss it with your wife.  I mean, if you had five inches before and you decide to go for a nine inch, she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine inch one before and you decide only to invest in a five inch, she might be disappointed. It’s important that she plays a role in helping you make the decision!”
The man agrees to talk with his wife.
The doctor comes back the next day. “So,” says the doctor, “have you spoken with your wife?”
“I have,” says the man.
“And what is the decision?” asks the doctor.
“We’re getting granite countertops.”

This video rocks, so I wanted to share it with my readers.

When you look in the mirror, I pray you LOVE what you see, simply because God created you to reflect His own beauty.

by BLAST graduate Charissa Steyn

When I look in the mirror, I always lean in for a close-up. I am discontent with the distance between me and that piece of glass. I want to see details of my skin, please! Every pore. Blemish. Stray hair.

The closer I get to the mirror, the more clearly I can hear its lies.

Look at those eyebrows…so dark and bushy. What about those little hairs on your chin…how disgusting. And those wrinkles under your eyes… your skin is getting old. And don’t forget those little red dots on your face… blemishes are so ugly.

Slowly, I begin to pick at every nook and cranny of my skin. Inevitably, my five minutes in the bathroom to simply wash my face and brush my teeth turns into fifteen minutes of surgery on my skin!  My refreshing nightly ritual is easily ruined as I allow the mirror to speak negativity into my life. As a result, all I want to do is jump into bed for fear that someone might see my embarrassing home facial job, my poor attempt to fix the flaws.

As women we are constantly faced with the temptation to look in the mirror. Rather than accepting and loving what is reflected we often despise how God created us. Most of us could write books on all the little facets about our bodies we want to change.

Too short. Too fat. Big nose. Dry skin. Oily skin. Big hips. Round face. Large pores.

Where do we come up with all these classifications anyways? Who determines the definition of beauty?

Not only do we look into the mirror of our bathroom, but we also gaze into the mirrors of our society. Magazines, models, and men….oh my! We look to them, seeking some sort of approval, but usually walk away more defeated than delighted.

When I am dissatisfied with my body, standing in front of any type mirror never helps. The only close up view I need is not found by peering into the mirror with a pair of tweezers, but gazing into Jesus and beholding His truth.

While reading a book on confidence by Valerie Burton, I was encouraged by her words:

“Identify one way in which you can embrace an aspect of yourself

that you have previously rejected.”

I believe this challenge is valuable to all of us as women. The mirrors we look into are distorting our perception of real beauty.

So go ahead — what bodily features do you need to embrace?

Is it hairy arms (oh wait, that’s me!), short legs, flat chest, frizzy hair?

Rather than being embarrassed by those body parts, let’s embrace them!  That’s how freedom is found!

My small group once took time to confess the areas where we felt the most shame or embarrassment in our physical appearance.  Much to our surprise, we realized we all had company! Each of us shared many of the same interesting bodily quirks.

By the end of the night, our shameful tears had turned to roaring laughter! All of us were set free, realizing that our bodies may not be perfect, but in light of God’s truth we were all stunningly gorgeous!

Being a sexually confident wife means living out this challenge on a daily basis — delighting in every part of our bodies, no matter what the mirrors may tell us!  When it comes to intimacy with our husband, accepting the way we were made will inspire the same response from our spouse!  Whatever you love about yourself, he’s going to naturally love it too!

Whether you get together with a group of ladies, or quietly chat with God, take this challenge seriously.  It can bring healing and freedom into every area of your life, including your marriage!

——————————-

Charissa Steyn has a passion to see women come to know their identity in Jesus Christ. After searching desperately for her purpose and value – in work, relationships, outer appearances-she has finally found her heart at home in Him. While ministering in Austria for four years, Charissa met her South African sweet heart and they married in August 2009. They are still falling in love and enjoying their new life together in Johannesburg. Currently she is working towards her Masters in Counseling, but Charissa can also be found taking care of her new hubby, running, baking fattening cookies, and writing about life’s unique little lessons on her blogs
Everyday Adventures – http://charsteyn.blogspot.com/
Blushing Brides’ Guide to __ __ __ – http://blushingbrideguide.blogspot.com/

We first saw this video some time ago while speaking at a conference in Canada, and I have to say we’ve never forgotten it. It communicates a revealing and powerful message, providing a rare glimpse past the magazine covers and billboards of seemingly perfect women…to the small army of hair, makeup, lighting, and photoshop professionals who make those images possible. In other words ladies, those images aren’t REAL! Check it out!

What do you think? Are you shocked? Do you feel a little bit set free or encouraged? Or perhaps a little angry? We want to hear your thoughts!

posted by Terrica

You asked for it, so here it is: more from current B.L.A.S.T participant, Charissa Steyn.  (I knew you’d love her! )

“Floating heads.” With just two words, this phrase caught me off guard. I could not read any further in the article. My mind began to fill with images of the days when I sat shivering in front of the heater, while a heavy blanket of insecurity covered my inner and outer beauty from me. The mirror revealed my destiny- I had to keep trying. I was still not whole.

I squirmed in my chair as my thoughts took me back to a place when I was desperately seeking fulfillment- in all the wrong places.

It was a place where the groans of an empty stomach were more appetizing than the laughter of a confident heart. I had exchanged the delight of being a vibrant confident woman, for being a” floating head.” Not exactly the bargain I intended to make, nor what I aspired to be in life.

Wholeness. That was a foreign concept to a girl who had become an expert at denial. An eating disorder left me nibbling the crumbs of cake, but even scarier, I was also taking meager servings of life. Damaged, incomplete, and ashamed were words that better described by life at that point.

I was dying slowly… in my body and my soul. The thought of never being able to have children crossed my mind on occasion, but it was not enough motivation to make me want to gain weight. Although my obsession with my body image was sabotaging every relationship in my life I still did not want to be healed.

Even though I knew Jesus, finding my wholeness, as a woman in Him seemed impossible.

The article I was reading this past week titled, “National Obsession,” by Counseling Today, got me thinking about my past. Its contents laid bare the gruesome details and statistics of eating disorders that are now common place in today’s society.  Women are willingly sacrificing their innate beauty for a plastic shell of superficiality.

Perhaps even worse was this- starting in the first grade, young girls were already being awakened to their weight and appearance. Their carefree childhood snatched away amidst the fears of gaining weight and becoming fat.

But the two words in the middle of the article had the most impact on me.

A counselor spoke of how she called her eating disorder clients, “floating heads.” She continued, “They are so disconnected with their own bodies, they don’t even recognize body sensations, and if they do recognize body sensations, they automatically interpret them as ‘something is wrong’.”

A wave of sadness rushed over me.

Floating heads. These two little words tell of how wholeness is being taken from the lives of many women today. One honest young woman wrote the following words to me, in regards to how she perceives herself, “I’m not in a place where I have a healthy self-image at all. There was a time when I did, and I know I will get there at some point again, but God is working hard on me in this area, and Satan is trying even harder.”

The enemy is working overtime to get women to feel empty, half-alive, and clinging to temporary forms of fulfillment. He has the most destructive diet on the market today, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy…” It’s a diet that tells women to seek for wholeness outside of Christ, in appearances, exercise, careers, activities, relationship, food…you can fill in the blank.

The promise of Jesus, “I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly,” feels like an impossible existence.

The same young woman wrote, “I don’t feel like I could be an example at all…and that is really hard and shameful for me to admit. Actually, this is the first time I’ve admitted it to myself I think.” Unfortunately, she echoes the cries of many other young women who are yearning to have wholeness instead of…

Physical sickness. Relational emptiness. Spiritual dryness. Emotional exhaustion. Sexual insecurity.

Are we ready to admit the truth- that our wholeness comes from Christ alone? We become beautiful women as we shamelessly indulge in the abundant life that God has given us, and confess we are nothing without Him.

I remember when I first had this revelation.  I began leaping up and down my hallway exclaiming, “I am a woman!” Can you imagine how good it felt to be this free?

My declaration demonstrated that I had finally realized the emptiness of trying to find wholeness as a woman in the fleeting fads of the world. I was finally taking big bites of life!

More than just a floating head out of touch with the rest of my body, I became a whole woman- body, soul, and spirit.

Physically strong. Relationally fulfilled. Spiritually alive. Emotionally stable. Sexually confident.

This revelation is worth tasting for yourselves!  It is sweeter than chocolate because it will also melt over into our marriage. Can you remember the last time you consciously took an oversized portion of life? Has it been awhile since you have savored and enjoyed your marriage?

The singing soul and energetic spirit of a woman living her life well, brings more vitality to her marriage than her physical appearance or feeble endeavors to find wholeness ever will.

Instead of taking from our husbands, thinking they can fill what is lacking in our lives, we can come to them as a “complete package” in Christ. We can be a whole woman who confidently gives herself without restraint to her husband- emotionally, spiritually, and physically.

Our husbands will be overjoyed to know that we are not ashamed to be a woman, boldly asking for second helpings of the life God has given us. Intimacy with our true love will be revitalized, and furious love making sessions will ensue when we are a whole woman. Besides, this is way more attractive than the national obsession of being a floating head!

Would you characterize yourself as whole, complete, and fulfilled in Christ? Or do you need to admit that you are far from this reality?

Are you taking meager servings of life- do you need God to take you off this dangerous diet so that you can celebrate your womanhood and savor your marriage?

by Terrica

Last weekend Josh and I drove out to my parent’s house in East Texas for Easter lunch.  They live on a ‘hobby farm’ of sorts including a herd of goats, and as always when Spring babies arrive I immediately tromp out to the pasture to cuddle them!

Standing among the herd on Sunday, I took particular notice of Holman, my mom’s lone goose.  Once upon a time he was part of a goose-trio, including Hazel and Honkers.  I still remember the day mom brought them home, tiny critters chattering in a cardboard box.  They grew up to be absolutely inseparable, a constant, waddling goose-clump.  Poor Hazel, the only lady of the bunch, eventually got sick and died.  Honkers also met an unfortunate, unmentionable fate.  (It included my dad and a shotgun…but I know that image will shock and dismay some of you so I won’t go into detail.)  So that left Holman, the lone goose.

And what does a goose do when his only mates are long gone?  Well, he’s forced to choose a new companion, and in this case, a sexy-new-goat-companion.  Intro Stinker.

Since the day his goose-mates went on to goose-heaven, Holman adopted Stinker goat.  He picked her from the pack and has never since left her side.  He follows her every step, keeping her company, protecting her by honking ridiculously if anyone (or even other goats or chickens, for that matter) gets within a few feet of her.  She, apparently, is his.  It cracks me up pulling into the driveway and seeing the goat herd off in the distance…along with one random goose.

Funny thing is, Stinker-the-goat doesn’t seem to mind at all.  She just puts up with him, unfazed by his constant presence, his protective hissing and honking.  On the other hand, she doesn’t exactly seem thrilled by it either.  As I stood amused watching them on Sunday, Stinker just seemed tired.  She climbed to the top of a big dirt pile and just lay down, probably trying to escape the blasted goose.  But there he was, slowed but not deterred by her ‘king of the mountain’ antics, struggling to waddle his big goose behind up the dirt mound.  I imagine if you looked up the definition of sigh in the dictionary, it would be a picture of Stinker chewing her cud, with this random goose in the background.  It really makes you wonder, does he realize she’s a goat?  Or maybe he thinks he’s a goat now?

I’m sure you’re wondering why any of this is relevant.

It absolutely makes the point that beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.  I was so comforted witnessing their ‘love affair like no other.’  Their goose and goat romance reminded me of all the women we encounter on a weekly basis who confess in tears that they struggle with self-image and the toll it’s taking on their marriage relationship.  Sometimes it’s baby weight that won’t budge 2 years after the fact, sometimes a crippling disability, often an altered view of themselves thanks to our media-crazed culture depicting beauty as large, perky breasts and a size-2 waistline.  Sometimes they’ve wrestled with pornography, molestation, or domestic abuse.  Sometimes it’s the undying echo of juvenile voices that told them they weren’t pretty, or simply daddies who never told them they were.  For whatever reason, they do not celebrate who and what they are, instead the mourn who and what they aren’t.  They don’t see themselves the way their husbands do, much less through the eyes of a loving God.  They are blinded.

Holman the goose?  He’s blinded all right, but in precisely the opposite way.  I don’t know if he realizes or not that Stinker isn’t exactly his type, but it’s obvious that doesn’t matter.  In fact, even if we brought him a sexy new-lady goose, I’m not sure he’d take to her.  Geese have an undying loyalty.  They mate for life.  It’s called ‘pair bonding.’  He’ll never leave Stinker or trade her in for someone ‘prettier,’ because it isn’t about what she looks like, it’s who she is: his companion.

As we packed up the car to leave on Sunday I stole one last glance out at the pasture.  Silly as it sounds, I thought I wish I could be more like that ridiculous goose, totally blinded to all my so-called flaws and insecurities and those of everyone around me. I want to sincerely celebrate each and every woman in my life, no matter what she does or doesn’t look like.  It isn’t about what she looks like, it’s who she is: my friend, my companion, my sister, my confidant, my family, myself. And then I prayed, no joke, Lord-help me be more like Holman-the-goose.

And then I laughed out loud, half-amused at my silly notion, half completely serious.

In light of our most recent topic (which we’ll be delving into more in the coming weeks–so stay tuned), today seemed the perfect time to introduce Charissa Steyn, a current participant in our B.L.A.S.T. program.  We think you’ll love her entertaining yet honest perspective on beauty just as much as we do!

Skimming through pre-marital books and seeing the sketches of the more “intimate parts” of marriage, usually left me gasping for air. My eyes peeled back in shock. These reading sessions were normally quite brief, since my ability to digest sex talk was quite low as an engaged woman!

My naïve mind was still haunted by the question, “What will my husband think when he sees me naked?”

Months before my wedding I was still vividly imagining the shock on my husband’s face when he discovered my prickly leg hairs, non-existent cleavage, and fuzzy arm hair in all their glory.

Sex with the light on. Never.

Lingerie. Not me.

Bubble bath together. In your dreams.

Obviously, I was nowhere near the definition of a sexually confident wife! Nearly every time I looked in the mirror my eyes focused on the mistakes.

Here’s why…

For most of my life I only owned two white bras and boy cut underwear in polka dots and stripes. I was known as the first person to grab a towel out of the swimming pool, and the last to walk around in a bra and panties in my all-girls apartment. Never wanting to draw attention to myself, I was ashamed of the way God had made me.

The desire for a perfect figure eventually led me into the biggest battle of my life so far- an eating disorder. Instead of giving me the confidence I desperately longed for, this obsession quickly stole my femininity.

Bones stuck out through my skin, and I soon found myself feeling like an “it,” rather than a woman.  Blinded to God’s beauty within me, a thick blanket of lies had succeeded in getting me to think I would never be pretty enough.

Obsessed with my appearance, I felt worthless if my thighs rubbed together. When my belly stuck out a little I would run for an hour on the treadmill. If I noticed any sign of fat developing I would nibble on some lettuce leaves making it my only meal of the day.

The scale became more than a machine. We had formed a bittersweet relationship. The smaller numbers it gave me, the more I enjoyed standing on it.

I was starving for confidence. Dying for change.

Fast forward my story to 2010.

My mission to be beautiful and thin came to an end as I journeyed ever closer to God’s heart.

God has shown me that counting calories and staying a size two will never make me feel beautiful.  I finally allowed Him to define beauty for me.

Beauty is who we are as a woman. It’s more than skin deep. Beauty runs wildly through our veins, flowing into our soul, spirit, and body. “Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation!” (Ps. 139, MSG)

Now, you will find me confidently sporting my two-piece swimsuit, even though my body is nothing like the women on magazine covers. The size of my thighs or how my jeans fit (even if they are a little tighter!) does not rock my world because I know that my curves are feminine. The scale only tells me my weight- it does not determine my confidence.

Although you may have never struggled with an eating disorder, perhaps, you’ve fallen into the trap of believing that binge dieting, late night workouts, and skin regimens can somehow give you the perfect body, and in return give you the confidence you so desperately desire.

Deriving our confidence from the number on the scale or the little tag on the inside of our jeans, will always leave us dissatisfied, and not to mention hungry!

Are you starving to be confident in your physical appearance?

Along with my testimony, perhaps you need a little more motivation in learning to love the body God has given you…

Being confident in your body will also unlock greater depths of intimacy in your marriage!

My husband is thrilled to see that I do not hide my body behind a towel, nor am I skittish in my lingerie, or fearful to be naked. Nothing could excite him more than to hear me say,

Sex with the light on. Definitely more fun!

Lingerie. Always!

Bubble bath together. Can’t wait!

As married women, the view we have of our body does not just affect one person, but two!

We must be able to rest securely rest in our husband’s embrace, knowing he loves every part. 

Before you try to wax off all your odd hairs, run yourself crazy on the treadmill, or complain about your awkward features- stand naked in from the mirror and accept, with a smile, the body that God has given you.

If God can take a woman who was once fearful of gaining a single pound and transform her into a sexually confident wife, then He can certainly do for you too!

Remember that true beauty is not something to be achieved; rather it is who we are as women. Our bodies are fingerprints of His handiwork.

Do you still battle to accept the woman in the mirror? What awkward features about your body (we all have them!) are you allowing to steal your confidence?

Being confident in our own skin makes us exceptionally radiant and attractive women. Better yet, it is a priceless gift we can give our husbands every day of our marriage!

For more from Charissa check out http://blushingbrideguide.blogspot.com/ and http://charsteyn.blogspot.com/