Shannon Ethridge's Blog

posted by Terrica

You asked for it, so here it is: more from current B.L.A.S.T participant, Charissa Steyn.  (I knew you’d love her! )

“Floating heads.” With just two words, this phrase caught me off guard. I could not read any further in the article. My mind began to fill with images of the days when I sat shivering in front of the heater, while a heavy blanket of insecurity covered my inner and outer beauty from me. The mirror revealed my destiny- I had to keep trying. I was still not whole.

I squirmed in my chair as my thoughts took me back to a place when I was desperately seeking fulfillment- in all the wrong places.

It was a place where the groans of an empty stomach were more appetizing than the laughter of a confident heart. I had exchanged the delight of being a vibrant confident woman, for being a” floating head.” Not exactly the bargain I intended to make, nor what I aspired to be in life.

Wholeness. That was a foreign concept to a girl who had become an expert at denial. An eating disorder left me nibbling the crumbs of cake, but even scarier, I was also taking meager servings of life. Damaged, incomplete, and ashamed were words that better described by life at that point.

I was dying slowly… in my body and my soul. The thought of never being able to have children crossed my mind on occasion, but it was not enough motivation to make me want to gain weight. Although my obsession with my body image was sabotaging every relationship in my life I still did not want to be healed.

Even though I knew Jesus, finding my wholeness, as a woman in Him seemed impossible.

The article I was reading this past week titled, “National Obsession,” by Counseling Today, got me thinking about my past. Its contents laid bare the gruesome details and statistics of eating disorders that are now common place in today’s society.  Women are willingly sacrificing their innate beauty for a plastic shell of superficiality.

Perhaps even worse was this- starting in the first grade, young girls were already being awakened to their weight and appearance. Their carefree childhood snatched away amidst the fears of gaining weight and becoming fat.

But the two words in the middle of the article had the most impact on me.

A counselor spoke of how she called her eating disorder clients, “floating heads.” She continued, “They are so disconnected with their own bodies, they don’t even recognize body sensations, and if they do recognize body sensations, they automatically interpret them as ‘something is wrong’.”

A wave of sadness rushed over me.

Floating heads. These two little words tell of how wholeness is being taken from the lives of many women today. One honest young woman wrote the following words to me, in regards to how she perceives herself, “I’m not in a place where I have a healthy self-image at all. There was a time when I did, and I know I will get there at some point again, but God is working hard on me in this area, and Satan is trying even harder.”

The enemy is working overtime to get women to feel empty, half-alive, and clinging to temporary forms of fulfillment. He has the most destructive diet on the market today, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy…” It’s a diet that tells women to seek for wholeness outside of Christ, in appearances, exercise, careers, activities, relationship, food…you can fill in the blank.

The promise of Jesus, “I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly,” feels like an impossible existence.

The same young woman wrote, “I don’t feel like I could be an example at all…and that is really hard and shameful for me to admit. Actually, this is the first time I’ve admitted it to myself I think.” Unfortunately, she echoes the cries of many other young women who are yearning to have wholeness instead of…

Physical sickness. Relational emptiness. Spiritual dryness. Emotional exhaustion. Sexual insecurity.

Are we ready to admit the truth- that our wholeness comes from Christ alone? We become beautiful women as we shamelessly indulge in the abundant life that God has given us, and confess we are nothing without Him.

I remember when I first had this revelation.  I began leaping up and down my hallway exclaiming, “I am a woman!” Can you imagine how good it felt to be this free?

My declaration demonstrated that I had finally realized the emptiness of trying to find wholeness as a woman in the fleeting fads of the world. I was finally taking big bites of life!

More than just a floating head out of touch with the rest of my body, I became a whole woman- body, soul, and spirit.

Physically strong. Relationally fulfilled. Spiritually alive. Emotionally stable. Sexually confident.

This revelation is worth tasting for yourselves!  It is sweeter than chocolate because it will also melt over into our marriage. Can you remember the last time you consciously took an oversized portion of life? Has it been awhile since you have savored and enjoyed your marriage?

The singing soul and energetic spirit of a woman living her life well, brings more vitality to her marriage than her physical appearance or feeble endeavors to find wholeness ever will.

Instead of taking from our husbands, thinking they can fill what is lacking in our lives, we can come to them as a “complete package” in Christ. We can be a whole woman who confidently gives herself without restraint to her husband- emotionally, spiritually, and physically.

Our husbands will be overjoyed to know that we are not ashamed to be a woman, boldly asking for second helpings of the life God has given us. Intimacy with our true love will be revitalized, and furious love making sessions will ensue when we are a whole woman. Besides, this is way more attractive than the national obsession of being a floating head!

Would you characterize yourself as whole, complete, and fulfilled in Christ? Or do you need to admit that you are far from this reality?

Are you taking meager servings of life- do you need God to take you off this dangerous diet so that you can celebrate your womanhood and savor your marriage?