Shannon Ethridge's Blog

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We were recently introduced to these ‘mouse pads for the soul’ designed to help men and women resist temptation and remain sexually pure as they use computers and surf the net, and had to share!  Aren’t they great?  We love them!

What tips and tricks do you use to avoid temptation??  Please share!

by Terrica Smith

A few years ago Josh and I were strolling thru the mall hand-in-hand when a little elderly man shuffled towards us, cane in hand.  I was concerned for a moment that he didn’t see us and began to ease out of his way, until he reached out a hand and warm smile to stop us, “Excuse me there, young man!”

We slowed.  “Yes, sir?” my good mannered, southern boy responded.

“You two married?” The bluntness of his question shocked us both momentarily.  I got the distinct impression we had a “talkin’ to” coming our way.  I glanced around nervously, racking my brain.  What in the world did we DO?

“Um…yes, sir?” Josh offered, more a question than an answer.

The old man stared silently for a moment at our still intertwined hands, then smiled up at us, eyes twinkling, “My wife, she was my best friend in the whole world.  I loved her all my life.  Gracious, I still love her.”  He chuckled quietly to himself.

He had our attention, but neither of knew where he was going or whether to respond.

“She was beautiful, really, my best friend.  I miss her every day.”  He paused, staring at the floor.

I resisted reaching for him, this complete stranger, wrapping him in my arms like a beloved grandfather I’d known all my life.

He looked up suddenly serious, shuffling closer, pointing emphatically as he spoke, “Now you listen to me, you hear.  Do you know, I held my wife’s hand every day.  That’s what you do, you hold hands.  You have to touch.  That’s how you love.  If you want to be in love all your life, don’t ever stop holdin’ hands.” He slouched back slightly, eyes twinkling, beaming as if he’d just entrusted us with the secret to life.

I grinned slowly ear to ear.  I had just fallen in love with the old man.  I was tempted to drag him to the nearest bench begging to hear his life story.

“Thank you,” I whispered with absolute sincerity, awestruck by his simple, violent wisdom.

With a knowing smile, he patted Josh firmly on the shoulder and shuffled away.

We turned to watch him.  “Wow,” Josh breathed, breaking his silence.

“Yeah,” I responded, shaking my head in disbelief, “what a treasure.”

“What?” he asked.  “The old man or what he said?”

I turned to him, squeezing his hand, “Both.  Absolutely both.”

Holding hands may seem an insignificant ‘secret’, but don’t underestimate the power of such a simple, profoundly intimate act.  When you take your spouses’ hand you’re communicating, “I’m with you.  We’re in this together.  I want to be here.”

It’s a simple practice in safeguarding your marriage as well, as you’re communicating to the rest of the world, “I’m with him.”  (Don’t even try, suckers!)

And if you’ve read The Sexually Confident Wife you’re also familiar with the power of oxytocin in regard to touch, so don’t be surprised if a little hand holding turns in to a whole lot more!

Do you and your husband or wife hold hands frequently?  If not, would you consider a 7-day hand holding challenge?

I want to introduce you to Terrica Smith (pictured here with her husband of 8 years-Josh), our new staff writer at Shannon Ethridge Ministries!

Terrica has served as my Events Manager for quite some time, although she originally came on board as my research assistant for the Sexually Confident Wife in the Spring of 2007. Having served in such capacities and traveled with me extensively the last few years, there’s no one I’d trust more to lend a slightly different, yet equally enthusiastic voice to my blog. She’s funny, down-to-earth, and her passion for life and marriage will no doubt inspire you! Lots to come from her in the weeks and months ahead, so keep an eye out! I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Shannon

P.S. We’ll also be showcasing a few of our current B.L.A.S.T. participants in the coming weeks, so look for them as well. To learn more about the B.L.A.S.T. program (Building Leaders, Authors, Speakers & Teachers) go to www.shannonethridge.com/blast

The Valentine-count-down clock is ticking, Ladies! With only hours left, it’s time to come up with some wonderfully creative ways to say “I LOVE YOU!” to your man. Here’s a few ideas to spur you on:

1. Leave a sexy love note in his underwear drawer. When he finds it the next morning, he’ll get a kick (or a rise) out of it.
2. Use a heart-shaped cookie cutter to make a light imprint on a slice of bread before you put it in the toaster. It comes out Valentine toast! Maybe even fill in the heart with red strawberry or raspberry jam!
3. Change the banner on his cell phone to say “Your Wife Loves You!” or “Gee, You’re Sexy!”
4. Rather than complaining about something he didn’t do, notice when he does something without asking and THANK him for it with a big hug and kiss. Everyone loves to feel appreciated.
5. Get a box of Red Hots and make a trail from the front door to the master bedroom for when he comes home from work. No doubt his curiosity will prevent him from getting sidetracked with mail and phone messages until AFTER he discovers his red hot wife at the end of that trail!
6. Look up what sporting events will air between now & Feb. 14th and record one on your DVR. Then on Valentine’s Day, tell him to relax with some snacks and watch the game while you relax in a bubble bath and give yourself a personal spa treatment. Who knows what will happen when you’re both done?!!
7. Plant a piece of his favorite candy on the passenger’s seat of his car with a note that reads, “Thanks for being so sweet!”
8. Use your lipstick or eyeliner to draw an arrow from any body part to any other body part, with instructions to your hubby that read, “Kiss me here!”
9. Create a coupon book of romantic dates and/or sexual activities, redeemable any time he’s ready. Make the last coupon “fill in the blank” style, so he can name his pleasure.
10. I’ll let YOU fill in the blank on #10 – join our blog at www.sexuallyconfidentwife.com/blog and post YOUR great ways to say “I love you” to your Valentine!

Isn’t marriage GREAT!!!??? Thank you, God, for such an incredible blessing, and for freedom to enjoy each another so completely!

Wishing you lots of heart-racing romance and shameless sex in your marriage,
-Shannon

I’ve been working all afternoon in a Panera Bread restaurant in Southern California (if you haven’t tried their Fuji Apple Chicken Salad or their Turkey Artichoke Panini, you haven’t lived yet – I’ve had it for lunch or dinner 4 times over the past 5 days).  I praise God for how well the events of the past several days have gone while speaking at a local church over the weekend, and BIOLA University, & Talbot School of Theology all week.  But after 5 days of being away from my family, I’m eager to get tomorrow’s radio interviews with Jim Burn’s HomeWord program behind me so I can get on a plane and head HOMEWARD myself (even though the forecast is calling for snow and ice.  Better soak up the California sunshine while I can, huh?)  I’m determined to get home ASAP, because my daughter Erin leaves for Australia on Monday to study art for 10 months in Sydney.  I’ll miss her terribly.

But I’m so thankful that I have such rich, rewarding work to keep me occupied as my baby birds begin leaving the nest.  I’ve spent the past several hours watching videos from last month’s BLAST meeting & reflecting on how blessed I am to get to witness so many participants BLOSSOM!  We’re currently reading a book together called “Bird-by-Bird” by Anne Lamott, and she’s really inspiring me to look beyond what you THINK people are like, and consider what really lies beneath the surface.

For example, on the flight here last Friday, a man sat next to me that I initially feared would slit my throat.  He was an unshaven Asian man with a black leather jacket and stocking cap, who looked like he just stepped off a Hollywood set as the bad guy in a Jackie Chan movie.  I was famished by the time the stewardess passed out peanuts and pretzels, but somehow as soon as she got to me she had run completely out!  A steward was servicing the rows behind me, and when he got to my chair, he’d run out too!  I thought I’d have to starve throughout the 4-hour flight, or drink my weight in orange juice to survive.  Suddenly the Asian man realized what had happened, and he held out his two snack bags and kindly said, “Would you like mine?”  I was humbled.  Then he reached into his jacket pocket, and I wondered if he was about to pull out a plastic box cutter or an underwear bomb detonator device.  Instead, he brought out a small sketch pad and a charcoal pencil.  He was working on a tiger lily.  My favorite flower.  And I sat there contemplating how terribly wrong my first impression was… and what an interesting character he would make in a fiction novel.

After de-boarding I walked into the airport restroom where I encountered a stunning woman, impeccably dressed, acrylic nails clutched around her suitcase handle.  She radiated the kind of class that would give you the confidence to leave your newborn baby in her care while you tend to your bathroom business.  But then she went from stall to stall, opening door after door, and soon began ranting about how “There are NO PURSE HOOKS in this *#*%* airport, and with the kind of money I pay to fly I shouldn’t have to put my Gucci purse on the *#%#* floor!”  And that’s when I realized that if I’d had a newborn in tow, I’d have been better off letting the scruffy Asian man in the black leather jacket babysit.

You simply can’t judge a book by its cover, can you?
-Shannon

My writing desk overlooks beautiful rolling hills and towering pine trees, which is a lovely sight to behold.  But over the past two days, God’s given me a special gift outside my window.  Although it’s been pouring rain, a huge family of brilliant red cardinals has been frolicking in my front yard, pecking at the pine cones and chirping as if spring has already sprung.  I’ve counted at least 20 at one time.  When we open the front door they scatter, filling the sky with what looks like tiny red Christmas ornaments flying around magically.  Within minutes, however, they always return to my yard to entertain me at my desk once again.

In case you didn’t know this about me, I’ve always considered the sight of a cardinal as God’s way of assuring me that He’s ever-present and in control.  Their bright red feathers reminds me that the bright red blood that Jesus shed is sufficient to cure whatever ails me, and that if God cares for even these tiny, frail creatures, surely He’ll continue caring for me.

This gift of a whole yard full of cardinals comes at a much-needed time in my history.  In 10 days, my almost-18-year-old daughter flies to Australia to study visual arts at a Christian college for the next 10 months.  We’ve known about this plan for 18 months, so it’s not like it’s sneaking up on us.  I’m truly excited for her as she fulfills this dream.  But I confess that the idea of not having my baby girl here beneath my own wing is a thought that has brought many tears lately.  I know all baby birds need to fly from the nest someday, and she’s definitely strong enough to soar.  But I know this Mama Bird’s going to feel the loss something terrible.

So when you read this, would you please pray that Jesus would continue sending  signs to remind me He’s in control?  Reminding me that He hasn’t just got His eye on the sparrow, but also on the cardinal, and on my own baby bird, Erin, as she flies to the other side of the world?

Many thanks,

Shannon

P.S.  Special thanks to one of my BLAST participants, Holly, for sending the following video clip about this exact season that I’m going through.  Moms of children all ages, you’ll enjoy this immensely!

I came across this video recently, and knew immediately I wanted to share it with my readers.  My first reaction?  I wanted to scratch this woman’s eyes out.  She made me want to vomit with disgust.  However, my second reaction?  I realized who she reminded me of…

ME… long ago… in my much wilder days, of course.  Praise God for complete transformations!!!

As you watch, resist the urge to choke “Erin.”  Instead, let the Holy Spirit lovingly reveal if there is ANY “Erin” in YOU!

http://www.worshiphousemedia.com/mini-movies/1687/After-Hours

Shannon